Another really complicated way to say something pretty simple...
Here's what it means.
So... If I think I'm a good husband and you think I'm a good husband we will get along great. But, if I think I'm a good husband and you think I'm a really bad husband, we aren't going to get along very well.
If we are out of synch, there are two ways of making this better.
1. I can change the way I see myself so that I match how you see me.
2. You can change the way you see me so that you match how I see myself.
Many arguments revolve around this question. Listen carefully to how you argue. How many of your fights are all about how you see yourselves and each other?