When a person who's afraid of freedom is sufficiently stressed he/she will view the person embracing freedom as dangerous. Freedom becomes toxic and threatens to destroy stability.
For example: "If you don't reign in your spending and live by our budget we will go bankrupt!" Or, " If you don't discipline the kids more consistently they will turn into juvenile delinquents." Or, "If you don't stop talking to your 'friend' at work, I can't stay in this marriage."
When a person who's afraid of limits is sufficiently stressed he/she will view the person embracing limits as dangerous. Limits become toxic and threaten to destroy a sense of freedom.
For example: "If I have to check with you or the budget every time I need to buy something I might as well be in jail with you as the warden." Or, "They are kids! Let them have some fun. You are always on them. That's why they don't like you." Or, "I have a right to decide who I want to be friends with. You need to back off and trust me!"
YOU ARE PROBABLY AFRAID OF FREEDOM IF...
YOU ARE PROBABLY AFRAID OF LIMITS IF...
These posts are written by Jake Thiessen, PhD, co-founder of Couples at Crossroads. We hope you find them interesting, helpful and maybe provocative. Please feel free to comment on them.